6/16/2020 – one month

I find myself making note of “anniversaries” every week. Things like “I should be X number of weeks pregnant now,” or “it’s been X weeks since we were told there was no heartbeat,” or X weeks since I delivered Astrid,” or “we buried our daughter X weeks ago.”

Today marks 1 month since we went to the hospital to start my induction and subsequent delivery of Astrid. I still catch myself wondering if this has all been a dream. I scroll through the photos we took in the hospital (and while wishing we had taken more) am grateful for the ones we did take.

I miss our baby girl so much.

Her older sister, Shecklet #4, asked to see pictures of her little sister last night. (I had been waiting for her to ask rather than ask if she wanted to see them.) She asked a few questions about her skin color, but other than that, just commented about how small her fingers were and how cute her feet were. She would have been so good at loving her little sister here on earth.