All good things must come to an end.
The Shecks had a good 17.5 year run.
A kid got left at church after Family Formation tonight.
Text from child left behind: Where are you?
Parent #1 replies : In the kitchen.
Kid goes to kitchen at church and replies: I don’t see you.
Meanwhile, Parent #2 realizes what is going on and says to Parent #1,
“How did you and #4 not realize #1 wasn’t with you when you left the church?”
Dear Jacob,
21 years
We’ve definitely had our ups and downs, but I can’t imagine going through them with anyone but you.
I love you. Thank you for being the strong, supportive, encouraging man I’m grateful to call my husband. ❤️
We really haven’t had what anyone in MN would call “Spring” this year. In spite of that, my memories of the final weeks we had with Astrid have been running through my mind.
Last month I attended the funeral for a young woman I never met but had recently met her parents. In the eulogies prior to the funeral service, her youngest brother spoke about how during a period of time when the young woman was not around for family gatherings, he would do a head count, feel her missing presence, and recognize his family was “not complete.” These two words struck me at my heart – I feel them two ways. One, as the missing person and two, as the person missing someone else.
When you lose a child who no one ever had the chance to meet “in real life,” it makes for interesting introductions. When someone asks how many kids I have, I almost always say 4. It’s not that I’m ashamed or embarrassed that I have two others (one miscarried and one stillborn,) rather, those are sacred parts of my life that I reserve for people who have earned the right to know. But as I answer the question about kids, I feel the words “not complete” in my chest. It’s a heaviness that I doubt will ever go away.
Shecklet #2 received the sacrament of Confirmation this morning at the Cathedral of St. Paul. It was a cool, rainy day but beautiful I’m spite of the weather.
I am so proud of this kid and how he has taken this next step in his faith. His sponsor, a young man from the parish who he has connected with over the years thanks to frisbee and his overall involvement with teens at church, has been a positive role model for #2 in many ways.
Grandma Patti and Grandpa Dave joined us along with Michelle (#2’s godmother). We celebrated after mass by gathering at the Rusty Taco.
This morning, Shecklet #4 and I went on a walk in search of decent coffee. Hotel coffee leaves much to be desired. I never thought of my self as a coffee snob, but the longer I drink it, the more particular I become. Perhaps that’s because I don’t like strong coffee and I miss my daily cup from the Keurig.
Our journey took us down the “Historic Main Street” of St. Charles, MO. The temps were pleasant (much nicer than back home) and it was a bit muggy from having rained overnight. After several blocks, we found a cute coffee shop where I ordered a vanilla latte and then we headed back to our hotel.
Our friend, (Shecklet #3’s Godfather) who is in STL for the Christmas season, met us at Immaculata Catholic Church and said Mass for our family and our friends, who were also in STL for the week. The church was beautiful. (Photo credit below goes to Shecklet #2 who asked to take photos of it after Mass.)
After Mass, we gathered in the rectory for lunch. Msgr. Gardin was kind enough to open his kitchen and dining room to our group. Fr. J. and Jake grilled steaks and burgers and Fr. J. prepared sea bass and sides. It was wonderful to get to share a meal with this great group! Sometimes God does show you why things don’t work out like you originally planned.
After lunch, Jake took the teenagers and tweens to the mall to see a movie – Avatar 2 in 3D. I went with our friends to the other side of the river (Troy, IL,) for a few hours. Before returning to MO, we drove down the highly-decorated street of our friend’s brother. The houses in the cul-de-sac go all-out and even have lights choreographed to music on a radio station. It is quite the sight!
After the movie ended, our group went to The Hill in search of a restaurant. We ended up at an authentic pizza place. Shecklet #2 said the pizza was some of the best he’s ever had. For dessert, we crossed the street and had gelato. Yum!
Our plans for Christmas break changed from road trip to homebound thanks to snow, sub-zero wind chills, and poor road conditions.
We had originally planned on traveling to STL on 12/23 to visit Shecklet #3’s godfather, then on to GA to visit family, and finally to FL to visit friends. On 12/21, the house was minimally decorated for Christmas, I was caught up on laundry, and we had minimal items left in the fridge.
School ended up being cancelled for Shecklet #2 on 12/22, so we we considered getting on the road a day early. However, IA looked like this:
We made the adult decision to stay safe and not risk the stress or potential car trouble while in a “towing not recommended” zone. Our cancelled plans meant we were able to play games as a family, decorate sugar cookies, and shovel lots of snow.
We were also able to attend Christmas Eve Mass at our parish.
Jake shopped for heavy appetizers earlier in the day for our after-mass Christmas Eve meal.
Christmas morning we opened gifts and relaxed for a few hours. Shecklet #1 assembled his LEGO set, we hung Shecklet #4’s new cork board, and Shecklet #3 got to work figuring out classic rock melodies on her guitar. Shecklet #2 had to wait to try his new goggles.
We headed to Jake’s parents house around 3pm for dinner and opening gifts. The Shecklets enjoyed getting to see their cousins.
Things got a little silly tonight while we were building gingerbread houses. This picture captures so much about the personalities of the Shecklets.
And here are the finished houses.
Twenty years ago seems like yesterday and forever ago at the same time.
We’ve loved through the joyful times as well as the gut-wrenching, sorrowful ones.
Thank you for being my partner through it all.
We were invited to attend the 2002 Prenatal Partners for Life banquet this evening. Mary Kellett contacted us to see if we were available to use three of the tickets purchased by a group who was no longer able to attend and wanted to offer them to someone else. We were able to take Shecklet #3 with us. It was her first “fancy” dinner.
During the presentation part of the event, we heard the story of a family who lost their little girl due to a chromosome defect. They were blessed to have a few days with her prior to her passing. It turned out that the little girl is the sweet baby who is buried next to Astrid. I ran into her mom while exiting the restroom and introduced myself. She told me that it is her MIL who will leave flowers at Astrid’s grave when she visits her granddaughter. I have often wondered who is behind the heart-warming gesture – now I know.
